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Happy Father’s Day

Today is Fathers Day and today is your day! You are loved and appreciated and hearing a few accolades of how great you are today.

We all have our own memories of our fathers and grandfathers that I wish we all could just sit and listen to. It is the stories or sayings that seem to stay with us when we share our memories of these people to others. When I went to the Connorsville United Methodist Church in Connorsville, Wisconsin and older gentlemen  used to tell a joke on Sunday mornings. It help to give me as a teenager the confirmation that church can be fun as well as inspirational.

  • Proverbs 17:22
    • A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
  • Psalms 126:2

    • Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, “The Lord has done great things for them.”
  • Job 8:21
    • He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting.

 

Let me share a couple of cute stories to lighten your heart today.

An Irishman in a wheel chair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that Jesus sitting over there?” The waitress nodded “yes,” so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on him.  The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked,”Is that Jesus over there?” The waitress nodded again, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, too.  The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, “Hey there sweet thang, how’s about gettin’ me a cold glass of RC!” He too, looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that God’s boy over there?” The waitress nodded again, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a cold glass of RC, too.  As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Irishman felt the strength come back into his legs, got up and danced a jig out the door.  Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Englishman felt his back straightening up, and he raised up his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.  Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck. The Redneck jumped up and yelled, “Hey, man, don’t touch me…… I’m drawin’  disability!!!!!”

 

Let’s look at some examples from church signs that make us laugh.

  • You are not too bad to come in. You’re not too good to stay out.
  • Try Jesus. If you don’t like Him, the devil will always take you back.
  • Aspire to inspire before you expire
  • Staying in bed –shouting , oh God! Does not constitute going to church
  • God does not believe in atheists, therefore atheists do not exist.
  • Forgive your enemies- it messes with their heads
  • Read the bible – it will be scare the hell out of you
  • And the best one is – Stop, drop and roll won’t work in hell- God

The Cowboy at the Pearly Gate

A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. ‘Have you ever done anything of particular merit?’ St. Peter asked.

‘Well, I can think of one thing,’ the cowboy offered.

‘On a trip to the Black Hills out in  South Dakota , I came upon a gang of bikers, who were threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn’t listen. So, I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face … Kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground.. I yelled, ‘Now, back off or I’ll kick the s— out of all of you!’

St. Peter was impressed, ‘When did this happen?’

‘Couple of minutes ago.’

Today is your day Men! Enjoy it and tell a story or two. You are so special and we appreciate all you do each day.

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How Do I Find the Time

Taking time to be with God does not need to take a long time out of your day. Any time with God is better than no time. Keep a few devotional books in by your desk, bed, bathroom (He will not mind), wherever you frequently have a moment to pause from your busy day. Open it and read a couple lines to start with. Just a little something to keep you on track.  Read the devotional clip that shows up on your Facebook page. It only takes a moment to remind you that God is there for you and all of us. God bless you!